"I sure hope you two get finished in time to go."
"Finished? With What?"
"Oh, the basement. It's pretty messy."
Even when it's tidy, the basement is a horrible place. It has a low ceiling--5'8" just like me. The Man Who Lives In My House is not allowed to go there, as he is on the tall side (6'4"). He is also on the forgetful side: he whacks his head every time. If I ask him go down to find a bottle of wine or bring up a load of laundry, he accuses me of trying to kill him. (He's on to me!)
Sunday morning found us in the filthy, chaotic, basement. It was a very successful episode. Nobody fought. Things were sorted into their respective bins. Shoes that seemed to be lost forever were found. We got rid of 3/4ths of the dress up clothes--we only kept the cool stuff. We hauled the big trunk where the costumes were supposed to be stored (they were always strewn all over) to the curb. That trunk always made me nervous. It was the perfect place to trap and suffocate your brother, or to accidentally slam off his finger. Some college kid nabbed it--now it will be a coffee table in front of a futon. We filled up one hefty bag with garbage, and three more with stuff for goodwill.
Here is some of the cool stuff that made the cut:
Cowboys have guns. Cool.
Weird glittery space alien dress looks GOOD with cowboy fringed jacket, platform shoes, ski hat and light saber. Perhaps he intends to ride the broom-he's never used it for sweeping.
Mexican wrestling mask + cape--we kept ALL the capes. They go with everything.
You never know when you'll need to be incognito--like if a girl comes over.
Now for the basement: I wish I'd taken a "Before" Picture. See all that bare floor? It was not there 3 hours prior.
Would I really have made them stay home and clean if the job had not been finished? We'll never know. I achieved my objective. No wonder they say I am the mean one.